In January I fell down a deep hole.
February was a mixed bag. I had a delicious cup of tea but also descended into madness.
Things improved in March. I met a wonderful dentist.
I wrote my will in April. I'll be leaving most of my wealth to global conglomerates. The remainder will be divided between oligopoly perpetraters.
I don't remember much of May. It passed quickly, like a holding midfielder.
I'll remember June forever due to the prevalence of the Gregorian calendar.
July felt not like a month, but a river that flows not downstream, but sideways. A strange but promising trench of muddy water.
Sunny, sweaty August. Oh how you lit me up and spat me out like a marzipan candle with a stone centre.
I'm looking forward to September. I can't believe we missed it the first time around.
My grandad's birthday was in October this year. But I shouldn't be publishing this because his birthdate is the code for the burglar alarm at my parent's house.
Remember remember the fifth of November, gunpowder, treason and plot. I know of no reason why my birthday season should ever be forgot.
And finally December! It was great to be home with the family again even if it was a bit stressful with all the Christmas shopping! As we sat down for Christmas dinner, smiles on our faces, we reflected on the year of 2019. And what a year it was! We reminded each other that whilst Christmas presents are important, the gift of love cannot fit in any wrapping paper.
Let's hope 2020 is filled with even more joy!
Happy new year everyone!