On a train traveling from somewhere
I've never wanted to say where my somewhere is; I wanted hereisdistant to live on hereisdistant.co.uk, not chez the inner city. My compartmentalised self gives the real world my boring sober words, and the online world (ie inquiry) my bloody riveting sober thoughts.
I withhold identifiable details, write on incognito and never tell anyone out loud that I am a blogger (and boy am I a blogger!!). I fear the operators of the flesh I converse with, seeing the inside of my head. That would just be rudeness. On the flipside I don't want some internet stalker finding out who I reeeally am (this is lies, apply within by forming an orderly queue, but only if you're decent eyecandy with the right set of genitals).
So I'm a big deal in the parking business. I'm absolutely smashing the world of airport parking. I work as an analyst for an e-commerce business, and let me tell you, I'm absolutely tearing up the industry.
I didn't want to divulge this information, as it's only small industry and if you were so inclined you could probably work out my employer. But fuck it, I want to gab all day about parking and I need to blog about why it's not surprising I've ended up there.
I overstayed my welcome at university, stealing two degrees with high classifications despite lacking flair and natural ability. I was just really good at writing essays which, it turns out, is all it takes. Where does a graduate without passion go?
He goes into parking as a joke. When I looked someone dead in the eyes as he told me he has a passion for finance I almost couldn't hold in my lol. Retail, technology, finance mean fuck all to me. Idealistically the public or third sector would be good, yet even they don't give me the hard-on needed for penetration.
So parking is the right place for me. I can be internally subversive by silently loling when I hear someone refer to themselves as a parking professional. But I can also let myself slip into huge conversations about the state of European parking, how the industry is changing, and what we should be doing. I'm investing my life into parking, but only as a joke because passion for me is vulnerability. When meeting new people I relish taking the piss out of the fact that I spend my days selling car park spaces.
I'm hereisdistant and airport parking is my life and my punchline.